KT's Anthrocon 2005 Diary

Page 5-4

Saturday, July 9, 2005

After the Masquerade, it was time for 2 the Ranting Gryphon's show. Before 2 came out, Spazfox opened for him. I recall Spazfox singing "Bohemian Rhapsody" in record time.

Then it was 2's turn. He talked about many things, such as how it seems to be socially acceptable to pull somebody's glasses off, put them on your own face, and look around saying "Wow, you're blind as a bat, aren't you!", but you can't do that with anything else, such as a walker. "Wow, you can't walk! Oh, you fell over." The bit I liked best was "How to make a Fundamentalist Christian stop talking". He described a plane trip he was on recently where the woman next to him struck up a conversation with him, but she turned out to be one of those religious nuts who peppers her dialog with "Praise the Lord! Praise Jesus!" and so on. Then she saw the engagement ring on his finger, and asked, "What's her name?" 2 replied, "His name is Timothy." She said, "Praise the-- GAAAAAH!" and didn't say another word the whole flight.

AC 2005 Improv Show Unfortunately, the AC staff's attempts to keep the evening's programming on schedule had gotten away from them a little, and the end of 2's show overlapped the Improv Show. Also, when I got to the room it was held in, there was no place to sit, and a standing crowd was gathering at the back of the room. But then I noticed an empty chair no one else had claimed, and grabbed it, and enjoyed the rest of the show. I participated in a game or two, such as Freezetag. Another game was Two-Line Dialog, in which two of the performers are given two slips of paper each; each slip has a random sentence on it, and the two sentences each performer gets are the only two lines they may say during the scene. Thus, Prismo found himself on a battlefield, saying only "That's just funny!" and "Ducttape'll fix that." At the end of the show, a few of us stuck around in the room, playing an impromptu game of Props with a couple of items from the Masquerade: a long balloon, and the body of the tinfoil trumpet. You'd be surprised how many uses these things have!

Back up in my room, I found someone had slipped another menu from a different Chinese restaurant under my door. This one led me to suspect that the Chinese are experimenting with genetics! The menu items included the following:

And then there were some really creepy entrées:

While I was getting ice, Chilly Mouse invited me to a room party. David Hopkins was there, as were Terry Mouse and, um, some other guy. We ordered pizza. I amused Terry by reciting Fenslerfilms G.I. Joe clips from memory. "Suzie, don't forget your sandwicheees!"

Chocolate cake plus Jolt Cola equals TERROR! Terry told a story about something weird he did once. He was at a party at a previous Anthrocon, there was a chocolate cake, and he wanted some, but there was nothing to cut it with. Then he noticed that they were using those transparent drinking cups with a really sharp edge on them, so he basically used a cup as a plug cutter and scooped up a quantity of cake with it.

So he was chatting and eating cake out of his cup, until he had just a little bit of cake left in the bottom, and suddenly somebody else (Herbie Bearclaw? Can't remember) walks up with a half-empty can of Jolt, fails to recognize the cake as cake, thinks Terry's just holding a cup of garbage, and before Terry can react, he pours the rest of his Jolt into the cup.

The mixture of cake and Jolt foamed up, forming a very solid head of foam that got a few inches high but didn't spill over the edge, and then it collapsed in on itself. The mixture then separated out into strata. Terry said it looked like a science museum model of the layers of the earth or something. It was creepy. Looking for a place to throw it away, he got on the elevator. As a spur-of-the-moment joke, he left the cup on the floor of the elevator by itself, pressed the first floor button, and got out.

Later, he found out it had caused some kind of "terrorist threat" scare. He was describing the incident to some friends, and Uncle Kage at the next table turned around and said, "That was YOU?!"

Eventually we all got sleepy and I said goodnight and went to bed.